SUNNY CAL JOURNAL - HURBONICS: Things Heard On Country Store Porch

(12/15/2023)
By Bob Weaver

In the Village of Hur, local educators, a number of years ago, developed a communication course called Hurbonics 101, which offered interpretative skills for "hillbilly" mountain English which tends to slow speech, slur words, and utter them in short, unintelligent statements.

Well, actually they didn't, but it sounds good.

This form of the spoken word is confusing to non-residents who have moved to Hur and help is needed for 21st Century interpretation.

Things heard on the porch of Charley Starcher's or McCoys Store at Hur during the 1940s-60s, or most everything you needed to know about life:

"Make me feel juberous," a person that makes you nervous.

"Sweet as pie."

"Loose as a goose."

"Crazy as a loon."

"A crock of shit."

"Two bricks short of a load."

"Don't have a penny to rub against another one."

"Stubborn as a mule."

"Naked as a jaybird."

"Don't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out."

"Shaking like a dog shittin' razor blades."

"Skinny as a bean pole."

"Up shit creek without a paddle."

"Dumber than a box of rocks."

"Might as well as be spittin' in the wind."

"Never judge a book by its cover."

"Yun Side" - Meaning on the other side.

"Sat there like a bump on a log."

"They're showin' their true colors" - real character.

"Smart as a whip."

"Haven't been here for a coons age."