Kathleen H. Taylor
fieldaflowas@yahoo.com
Welcome back to the 'burbs of Beason. We appreciate you stopping by to read our stuff that will never be revealed on YouTube or Myspace first.
I had been wracking my bleached out brain all week for something to write about. A lot of things I had considered would be censored, so I thought I should leave my column at least PG-13 rated. Anyway, I watched the ACM Awards on Sunday night. That show gave me enough material to last a lifetime. I had heard a certain performer was to be on the show that I had seen years ago. He had this reputation for great music as well as awesome stage shows. I paid fifty dollars to be blown away. What I got was jacked. No fire, no dangling from a rope, no jumping into the audience. Gosh, I was disappointed. Anyway, he comes on the awards show and attempts to do a medley of greatest hits. The keyword here is "attempts." He completely butchered the songs that once made him a star. Sometimes, I think there are celebrities that just don't realize it's time to fold. Dude, it's past time to fold. Please just sit back and enjoy the trillions of dollars that you made. Someday I want my fifty bucks back. You don't have to tell me, "Check is in the mail". (Along with the AWOL rebate check) Come to think of it, I did keep my ticket stubs. Do you suppose some crazy fan on Ebay would give me fifty dollars for them? I'll even throw in free shipping.
What is the deal with these rebate checks? I have heard some aren't getting what they were told. Rumor has it that some didn't receive theirs due to college loans. Isn't the whole planet still paying on college loans? So, here's what I do not understand. If one takes our pocket-change check away, how can we pay for the gas to go to our job to pay back our student loans? That seems to be taking away any hope for the economy rather than giving it.
Since I am still on my soapbox, I will address the gasoline situation. I might be blond (at least today anyway) and somewhat of a redneck (OK, I are one) but it doesn't make me stupid. Why is our administration supporting foreign countries while totally ignoring our own? Why aren't the resources in the US being used so we can afford to drive to work to pay our bills? I've heard you can buy a map in most stores in case there was some confusion about what states the resources might be found. I'm sure there's a Secret Service guy that can run out and get one during his catered lunch break. You might have to front him some gas money to get there though.
OK, I am officially off my soapbox and back to normal (however, according to some sources, what normal is for me has yet to be determined).
I have noticed that some have done their first cut of hay. It's hard to believe it's already that season. The time to get out the allergy medicine and the bulk supply of Kleenex.
I think we are the last people in the Beason 'burbs to get the lawn mowed. We finally got it done today. Ever hear that Jeff Foxworthy joke, "you might be a redneck ifâ¦you mow the yard and find a car?" How about an S-10 truck? Does that count? Even though it makes such attractive lawn decor, the truck needs to go. I'm getting tired of my yard being applicable to most of the "you might be a redneck" lines. Mr. Foxworthy could come visit and find enough material for the rest of his career. Maybe I could give him one. For example, "you might be a redneck if..you have more hanging plants and wind chimes on your house than at Wal-Mart."
Beason 'burb livin', gotta love it.
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