Submitted by Brandy E. Brabham
Extension Agent - Roane & Calhoun Counties
Agriculture & Natural Resources
WVU Extension Service
Norman Rockwell's paintings of families engaging in everyday activities continue to evoke warm feelings and fond memories. Popular television shows from the 1950s and '60s, such as "Ozzie and Harriett" and "Leave It to Beaver," create nostalgia by depicting fathers who are kindly, mothers who always look their best and children who are mischievous yet lovable.
Families enjoying meals together is a common theme depicted in the Rockwell paintings and the television shows. Family mealtime, research shows, is more than a winning foundation for heart-warming art and television scripts. In reality, family meals not only nourish the body but also nurture the soul.
Children need family meals. A survey conducted by the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University found that the more often children and teens have dinner with their parents, the less likely they are to smoke, drink or use illegal drugs.
However, families' lives today are more hectic and activities more diversified than ever before, causing many families to skip family meals.
Children and youths have more options for after-school and evening extra-curricular and recreational activities that take them away from home. In more families today, both parents work out of the home, leaving less time for family ventures. And, an increasing number of single-parent households face pressures such as reduced financial resources, minimal social networks, work demands and limited free time.
In short, the busy lifestyles of today's families have altered ways in which family members interact with one another. One detrimental change is the diminishing sharing of time for conversation, nourishment and enjoyment during family meals together.
Family meals provide a forum for all family members, young and old alike, to connect and stay connected with each other.
"Mealtime is the time for family members to come together and share their daily happenings with each other. It is a time to discuss items of interest that affect family members and a time to connect with each other," says Dr. Patrick Nestor, Extension specialist, West Virginia University Extension Service.
Most families would like to have family meals as part of their household routine. In fact, according to the Purdue University Center for Families, surveys indicate that the vast majority of families (80 percent) value mealtime together, but few (33 percent) successfully achieve that daily goal.
Is your family too busy? Finding the timeâplacing high priority on family mealsâis critical.
Kristi Gannon agrees. The Lewis County woman is a wife, mother, cardiac nurse, PTO (parent-teacher organization) president and community volunteer. Even though she is a working mother, her three young children are actively involved in after-school and extracurricular activities. That busy schedule, however, includes time for family meals.
"I think it is important to eat dinner at our kitchen table so we can look each other in the eye and know what is going on with one another, how we feel. And most important," she says, "I know my children are getting the proper nutrition that is prepared with love."
The West Virginia University Extension Service recommends these tips to help get you get started on the path to better health and better communication through the sharing of family mealtimes:
Schedule! Schedule! Schedule!
Schedule your family meals just as you would a doctor's appointment or an important meeting that you must attend. Look at your and your spouse's calendar for the upcoming week to determine the meals that will be designated as "family meals." Write down "family meal" and the time on each day that you have selected.
Next, make certain that everyone in the family puts these days and times on their calendars, too. Finally, put a reminder card on the refrigerator door or other spot that all family members will see often to remind them (and you) of the designated family meal dates.
Start Slowly
If you are not having family meals, it would be unrealistic to expect that you and your family will begin to eat together every evening. Unrealistic goals often lead to discouragement when they cannot be attained. So, begin by planning on having just two or three meals each week. Maybe one of the meals could be a brunch together on Saturday or mid-afternoon barbecue on Sunday. And, having breakfast together counts, too.
Make sure that family members are sitting together around the table rather than watching television while sitting at TV trays or lounging on the floor. In fact, turn off all electronic devices including cell phones. If you are currently having family meals together, congratulations! Keep up the good work and add as many meals together as possible to your current regimen.
Plan Ahead
Sit down and plan your menus for the family meals and an accompanying grocery list. Try to go grocery shopping prior to the first family meal of the week. If possible, purchase all of your weekly groceries at one time. This will not only save time but money, too.
Grocery shopping takes time and energy. Realize that you may be too tired after work to shop and then prepare the meal. So, select the best time for you to shop.
Use That Slow Cooker
Most kitchen cabinets have at least one slow cooker hiding somewhere. Find yours, and purchase a slow cooker recipe book with simple but tasty recipes.
By cleaning veggies and dicing meat in the evening, you'll be able to prepare much of the next day's evening meal early. After you've sliced and diced, store your preparations in the refrigerator. The next morning, place all of the ingredientsâincluding seasoningsâin the slow cooker. That evening, complete the menu with fruit or a salad. Together, your family will enjoy a hot healthy meal that was ready for them and easy for you.
Convenience Foods Are Fine
Today, you can buy foods at the grocery store that can save a lot of preparation time while still being nutritionally sound and quite tasty. One example is frozen pasta and assorted veggies with seasoning. When that's added to fresh chicken ⦠yum! Side salads are now quite easy to serve if you purchase packages of prepared lettuce selections. For dessert, serve a fresh fruit cup with lime sherbet on the top. A sure winner!
Celebrate! Celebrate! Celebrate!
Get the most out of your time together as a family. Celebrate accomplishments (especially those of little ones) that may have been made by family members since your last meal together. Make sure that your children and teens look forward to family meals by serving their favorite beverages and desserts only during family meals.
Set the table with special plates, cute napkins, fluted dessert dishes (you can find them for just $1 each) and other fun serving pieces that are used just for family meals. How about pancakes by candlelight? You'll be surprised how quickly new traditions for your family will be established.
Everyone Helps
Every family member from toddler to grandparent should have an "assignment." ("Chores" are never fun, but "assignments" are acceptable.) Some mothers may feel that such tasks are "easier to do myself." Each time you feel that way, remember that assignments help family members learn responsibility.
Assign tasks that are age-appropriate and safe for the children. "Assignments" may include setting or clearing the table, pouring beverages and sweeping the floor.
Large tasksâsuch as washing the dishesâshould be rotated among family members whenever possible so that no one is "stuck."
Is incorporating family mealtime into an already full schedule easy? No. But, as the old saying goes: "Nothing worthwhile ever is easy." Talk with your family soon about the new and exciting adventure that you are about to embark on together. Have a special snack as you talk about ideas for family meals such as orchestrating schedules, menu planning, cooking and cleanup.
And always keep your goals in mind: increased communication and sharing, improved nutrition and slowing the hectic pace of the day to enjoy the company of each and every family member.
Want to speak to someone locally about introducing family meal conversation or preparing healthy meals? Contact Calhoun County WVU Extension agent, by calling 354-6332. The Calhoun County office of the WVU Extension Service is located in the basement of the Calhoun County Courthouse in Grantsville. | 
