CRESTON NEWS

(12/06/2004)
By Alvin Engelke

By Alvin Engelke

alvinengelke@hotmail.com

Someone threw some hot lead near the John Cash residence at Cremo. While no one caught any, someone did burn down an outbuilding that held all of the late Ferris Cash's worldly possessions. It was understood that the gendarmes were investigating.

Mr. & Mrs. Joe Cunningham and Mr. & Mrs. Paul Williams were among those calling on Paul Lee at the Minnie Hamilton Health Care Center.

A big crowd was on hand for the Creston auction. The next auction will be January 8, 2005. Santa Claus will be visiting with the children during breakfast at the community building on December 18. Photographs will be available and activities start at 9 A.M.

Ellen Hedge donated some Christmas lights to the community building.

Jack Bishop was attending to business in Creston Saturday evening.

Nancy June Hall is undergoing cancer treatments again.

Donna Sue Ferrell has a new, to her, automobile, as Carl was not able to get the valve that came out of the engine of her old one to go back in place.

Some local residents are bragging about their big bucks. One fellow whose wife bagged a nine point said he has been leading a rough life. Others told similar tales of woe while others said, "Just wait until muzzle loader season". Also it was reported that there were some "industrial strength" disagreements between some hunters and that threats were made that the game wardens would be called "to referee".

Anna Engelke and Jessica Potter went to State College Pennsylvania to see the Penn State student play, "New Brain". On the way back a piece of the muffler came loose so Anna had to crawl under the chariot and use an ice scraper to finish removing the discombobulated part.

A comely blonde who lives near Morgantown said, "Be sure to tell Matt [Copen] Hi." Matt sure has good-looking prosperous relatives. He can give all the details.

Alvin Engelke was calling on Glenn Hill who lives at the Cedar Grove Personal Care home.

Mr. & Mrs. Butch Goodnight was calling on C. Glen Arthur and other area friends and distant relatives.

Gerald Woodring was calling on Mr. & Mrs. Eddie Norman. It was reported he was reminiscing about his old friend "Freckles". He also supervised putting up Christmas decorations.

It was said that one comely brunette had stars in her eyes the other evening.

Logan Lowe was visiting Hope Starcher. They both fixed up some pictures for "Cap'n Eddie".

Charles & Euell Russell were consulting their physician.

The "House of the Insane" was visiting the "Nut Hut".

Recently it was announced how the ACLU makes lots of money. They bring a court action against a town, city, county or some such because a religious symbol was present and then the liberal judge they pick for the case rules for them. They had one of their friends write a federal law that allows them to charge the town, city or whatever for their legal fees which allows for a lucrative scheme for the group. Recently a school in California banned the Declaration of Independence from the premises because of possible religious references. There is a move to remove any and all references to anything having to do with especially the Christian religion. Others, with the exception of Judaism, are, of course fine.

It now appears that the folks down at the Mouth of the Elk River couldn't pull off their special December legislative session because of some prior nasty legislation that stated when terms began, etc. With the New Year though one will do well to keep a close watch.

A Roane County oil producer said that this fellow came to him to ask if he would drill a well for him. The local fellow said to himself, "I remember this fellow; he was around here before skipping town. In fact, I think . . . ." At this point the visitor said, "Hey, I think I remember you! Didn't we meet when I was in the federal pen?" To which the local fellow answered, "No, I did not meet you in the pen and no, I will not drill any wells for you." It seems that the boom has brought all the shady characters back out from wherever they had been hiding.

Reflecting the crash in worldwide crude oil prices, the local price of Pennsylvania grade crude fell to $39/bbl on Saturday.

It was reported that nuptials are in the plans later this month.

Mary Wolverton of Big Root had a stroke over the weekend. She was a Basnett and a native of Lower Annamoriah Creek. Local residents hope for a speedy and full recovery for her.

Danielle Duckworth, Jackie Nutter and Doreen Parsons were among those calling on Mr. & Mrs. Carl Ferrell & family. Some folks were trying to figure out how to fix Doreen up with one of Uncle Dupie's boys.

Two local ladies were dining at a posh eatery in Parkersburg. They had both ordered BLTs but they discovered there was no tomato. " Oh", said the waiter, "didn't you read the sign that because of the hurricane tomatoes are extra?" In the ensuing confusion & frustration one of the women ended up with a "mixed drink".